Fizz
One of my best moments so far have been five or six intermittent minutes on a sleeper bus from Kunming to Jinghong.
Now that I have some down time, I have the chance to truck out some memories that I have along the road, but haven't found a good way to summarize in my previous blogs. They're mostly scatterbrained thoughts that pop in and fizz out, usually when I'm trying real hard to fall asleep on a tough bus ride, or when I'm trekking along and the rhythm of my breathing produces hypnotic sensations, or when someone in the course of a rambling conversation mentions something offhand... moments where I don't have pen and paper handy and have to squirrel away those thoughts for more sensible times.
Except that now when I write them out, they don't have the brilliance that they did when they were still rough in my head. Nothing new there – but especially when I'm on the road, life's already in drift, and somehow, in that motion, my transient thoughts seem somehow more significant, as if the nature of transitory thinking is magnified by physical transit (how many synonyms for movements did that sentence have??).
One of my best moments so far have been five or six intermittent minutes on a sleeper bus from Kunming to Jinghong. The stars jumped in and out from the T-heads, and from my cot by the window, the curved sky swung by it's girdle on every turn and each hug by the creaking bus around the mountains... it's one of those so-so-so honest moments that if described, I'd sound like a loon, but it's as if all the angels in their mournful silence and all the saints and their infinite smiles and all the children and their peals of laughter jumped deep and splashed into the heart of your soul (somewhere between your ribcage and your abdomen) and filled you with that volume of shame and pride and longing and hope... all at once... it was something like that.
Well – the Internet closes in this town early, so until I get back sometime. Woa – I smell durian on the streets! Mmmmm... durian shake...
too bad there's not a way to record feelings and emotions, b/c what you describe is something i would like to feel...do you feel a weightiness in your chest like something inside is bursting to get out?
Posted by: kyle | July 09, 2006 at 10:18 PM
Honestly? It's like something is trying to stay in..
Posted by: j.fisher | July 13, 2006 at 01:23 AM