"happiness is like peeing in your pants. everyone can see it and you can sure feel it."
"josh. call your girlfriend. you're her gatekeeper."
"'scuse me?"
"creak. open. close. gatekeeper." "
you big perv."
"asians have a good way of relieving stress. tai chi. meditation. inner awareness."
"what are you talking about? i'm all substance abuse. smoking. drinking. if i can't release stress on someone else, i release it on myself."