Why are people together? Why do certain relationships work and others don't? Before Candice, I was entangled in messy, psychotic, sad, and crazed affairs. They made for great drama. But those relationships were kind of like roasts, and I was the hunk of meat, raw and bleeding. Ever been burnt? The pain is sudden and sharp. I never knew I was being burnt until they became great dramas of loss and betrayals. And of course, I always jumped from the pan into more fires!
Two guys I know are getting engaged. For one of them, I was the first to learn that he was going to propose – before his friends, family and fiancee. Go me. (I couldn't help it, I overheard his phone conversation as he was pulling money out of his IRA to purchase the shiny pretty thing.) They exemplify my confusion about why some couples stick. One guy isn't much of a looker. I would also say that he's rude, arrogant and typical in that most banal sort of way: white, upper-middle class, frat boy. But his fiance is a gorgeous: blonde, vivacious and a laugh like one of those music boxes. The other guy is accomplished, funny and not that bad looking. His BTB (bride to be), on the other hand, is unfortunately dumpy, lumpy and .. well, she would make the perfect 8th dwarf, complete with one of those funny accents.
I don't get it. Why do they fit? Lots or reasons, I guess. One person's hag may be another person's Venus.
The mysteries of human connections are too deep for me to stay under too long. The cynic in me thinks that many of these couples settle for one another. It seems like whenever the clock starts to hit 35, the cuckoos pop out, and otherwise happy people flutter toward nests newly populated by Crate & Barrel inventory.
What do I know? Candice and I have stepped to this dance twice before and yet here I am, a sucker for the heat.